SionPhoto

SecretStockr ®

It came to me in a blinding vision...after I woke up and banged my head on the underside of a pub table.

See, the problem with microstock losers is their prices just aren’t low enough. They just don’t have the cojones and snappreneurial acumen to take their online businesses down to the next level...

Thus a paradigm shift was born:

Secretstockr ® - Its like microstock, just taken to the next logical step.

Taking my website down for a redesign, and being laid up with a busted leg meant I dropped off the map for a while, but my sales during that episode (er...none), simply reflected the tanking economy, thus rendering my current profit margin cast-iron recession-proof.

So I never have to compromise on my fee structure AND the immutable laws of Supply and Demand mean that my images rarity (so rare, they can hardly ever be seen) boosts their value massively.

Web 2.0 was social networking...

...this is Web 3.0, oh yeah baby. This is AntiSocial NotWorking ®

It’s boldly going to the outer limits of the Long Tail and pinning it on the donkey of success.

W00t!

Secretstockr ® - remember where you heard it first. When I swish past you in my Lamborghini after IPO’ing my idea to Google, I’ll say hi.

Tell me exactly what you saw and what you think it means...

Is it a documentary? A feature film? Nah, its a commercial, but a lovely piece of work nonetheless, with a great understated comic performance by Martin Scorsese.

Which brings me on...some of you might have wondered about the somewhat opaque blog post titles in the past few weeks. Well, they're all quotes (er, except the first question) from movies, carefully laid down in preparation for the

SionPhoto Kristmazz Kwizz!

By way of a clue, each blog post title does have something in some way, to do with the content of post itself, so bonus points for anyone figuring out what those links are, with some other bonus questions thrown in if they come to me while typing.

The prize? I was gonna offer up a bottle of that Scorsese bubbly, but was worried about the bottle exploding in the post (or it being drunk by me first...) so, I'll think o' summat else.

Without any further ado - the Kwizz Kweschuns...

1/ Epiosode IV: A New Hope

An easy one first - which movie is this from?

2/ Cut You Buggers...Cut!

Which legendary director directed this movie? Which actor utters the above line before plunging to his doom?

3/ Oh, I'm a Funny Guy? Like a Clown? I AMOOZ You?

This quote is too well known...so...what was the name of the man who was killed by the character who utters this line, and whose death later causes his murderer to be assassinated?

4/ How Does He Get His Copy Out? Specially Trained Hens.

Which photojournalist speaks this line, in which film? And (Fiendish Bonus Question) why did he go on to vote for George W. Bush?

5/ They Won't Want us To Ask 'Em. They'll Just Want Us To Get It For 'Em...

Which movie? What connects this movie to Flash Gordon? And why does the above line uttered in the film have so much relevance today?

6/ If anyone approaches, you shout "Halt, Who Goes There" and take down their credentials...

Which British TV show was this movie made from (Clue: Tony Benn mentions it in his interview)?

7/ I Dont Take Sides. I Take Pictures.

Which photojournalist character utters this line while in jail? And (Fiendish Bonus Question) what language does he speak it in?

8/ Don't lets spoil everything. We've only just met. No, we haven't met. You've never seen met.

Whats the fictitous photographers name in this movie? And which real photojournalist provided the images seen in the film?

9/ Who in God's name has automatic rifles? Dashed unsporting. Probably Belgian.

Who is the author of the graphic novel, which was adpated into the movie from which this line is taken? Whats the name of film?

And finally...

10/ Tell me exactly what you saw and what you think it means...

The Scorsese commercial makes visual references to many Hitchcock films - who speaks this line? What's the name of the press photographer in the flick?

And what links that movie snapper to the author of this blog?

Thats it! Send your answers to

sionphoto@hotmail.com

with 'Kwizz' in the subject line.

The one who gets most answers right wins a prize.

If nobody answers? Erm...the whole thing will be quietly buried and conveniently forgotten like a reality show voting scandal, or the invasion of Afghanistan.

Who in God's name has automatic rifles? Dashed unsporting. Probably Belgian.

I've always been a bit bemused by what seems to be a relatively recent trend in photojournalism of using 'retro' techniques and cameras - Holgas, 5x4, Lensbabies...

It is I suppose, as much a symptom of digital disruption as any other (along with the tendency for photojournalism to retreat into elitism), but why re-invent the wheel, when you can have the jetpack?

Or better still, why not just use the best of both?

Don't let's spoil everything. We've only just met. No, we haven't met. You've never seen me.

I Dont Take Sides. I take Pictures.

AP photographer Bilal Hussein finally had the opportunity to sit in front of a court yesterday, after being detained by U.S. forces in Iraq 19 months ago.

Although calling it a 'court' is obviously dignifying what looks like a legal farce and a complete mockery of due process.

The details of the hearing are going to be kept secret, the defence lawyers can view materials presented at the hearing, but not take any copies away with them, and Bilals lawyer, Paul Gardephe cannot speak to him without a US soldier and military interpreter being present in the room.

As Gardephe says:

"You cannot prepare a defendant for a criminal trial with the prosecutor in the room"

Even if the Central Criminal Court of Iraq (CCCI) releases Bilal Hussein, the U.S. retains the prerogative to continue to hold someone as a security detainee, even if the CCCI clears them.

Tony Blair, at the US Congress, 2003:

"Our ultimate weapon is not our guns but our beliefs ...any time, ordinary people are given the chance to choose, the choice is the same. Freedom not tyranny. Democracy not dictatorship. The rule of law not the rule of the secret police."

If anyone approaches, you shout "Halt, Who Goes There" and take down their credentials...

Heres a little SionPhoto podcast experiment...it's the audio from an video interview with Tony Benn I shot a while ago for the MWAW film.

Very little of the interview was shown in the eventual video, so this makes use of the additional footage in another context (its also marginally easier to edit just the audio). Having stuff which can be repurposed via several outlets, is something that freelances should be thinking about, as media begins to converge.

Obviously it's something which can't be done with conventional digital stills cameras. Some people are using sound recorders with digital stills cameras, but its really only a matter of time I think, until the practical advantages of having one machine which captures multiple media (stills, video and sound) begins to outweigh having a device which only does one thing (however great that one thing is), or having to carry around multiple devices.

Multi-use devices and strategies are still in their infancy, but present trends suggest that will change, and much sooner than we all think.

Anyway, enough blah, here's the podcast. Some of the sound is a bit ropey, due to me having to create voiceover narration without having a decent microphone to hand, but you'll get the basic idea...